Women’s Books Solo Travel After Friend ‘refused to engage’ to travel plans

A woman has moved on with a solo trip to Europe, after months having waited for her friend to commit herself to her planned getaway together.

On one post At Reddits “Am in The A ——” forum, the 23-year-old wrote that she had planned a solo backpacking trip across Europe for her degree when her 22-year-old friend Avery mentioned that she would be interested in joining.

Although she said she was originally “excited and liked the idea of ​​having companies, especially since I had never been to Europe before,” the woman, however, explained that she was the one who planned all the details about the trip from the beginning.

After telling Avery that she wanted to go for three weeks, the woman said that the friend counteracted her, expressing that she was interested in doing two, which was accepted. She also wrote that her highest priorities for the trip included France and Italy, but she was “open for adjustment.”

“I sent her travel plans, examined hostels and calculated logistics. She responded most with excited Tiktoks but did not actively plan,” the woman explained then.

The biggest question eventually took grip when gathered the trip came to actually book it. After months to ask Avery to find flights, the woman said that she “continued to delay that we should first book a hotel, or that she needed to check with her parents or sort out her summer job.”

“Last week I put my foot down and told her that if we wanted to go in early June, we had to book as soon as possible before prices went up,” the woman continued. “She promised we would book that weekend … then nothing happened.”

She also acknowledged that the friend’s traveling styles are different, which only increased the problem. While looking for a “high-end backing trip that stopped at female hostels, met new people and held a flexible itinerary,” the woman stated that Avery had other ideas about how the trip would go.

“She suddenly decided that she was too scared of hostels and just wanted to stay in a hotel, which made the trip more expensive,” the woman said. “She also insisted on booking every flight, train and hotel, while I wanted some structure but also the freedom to be spontaneous, maybe decide the last minute to go to Switzerland instead of Croatia, for example.”

After back and forth, discussions simply landed on visiting Spain and Croatia. “Two places that were not even on my top list,” the woman clarified however: “I wanted to visit several countries, but she did not want to go to Italy and insisted on just two destinations.”

The woman further detailed that Avery’s plan was to spend ten days in Spain and four days in Croatia, which she said it felt “far too slow.”

In the middle of the whole back and forth, the woman said that she “felt like my degree trip had been transformed into her ideal holidays.”

“I wanted an exciting, spontaneous adventure – one of my last chances to make something crazy before I joined my career,” she continued. “Instead, she pressed on a structured, stiff trip that felt like something I would do with my mom or a retired couple.”

After the woman said that Avery “still would not commit”, and the flights became more expensive as the time passed, she decided to book her trip alone.

But the action did not go well with her friend, the woman said. “When I saw her yesterday, she told me that she was finally ready to book. I told her that I had already planned to go solo, and she was really upset and said that I hurt her feelings and that she could not think I would do it for her,” she wrote.

“I feel bad because I know she was excited,” the woman continued. “But I also gave her months to commit.”

In the comment section in the Reddit post, different users shared their views on the situation and offered advice.

“You didn’t beat her, you fled from Trip Purgatory,” wrote a user. “She had months to get involved and just kept staying. At some point, you had to choose between waiting forever or actually going on the adventure you wanted. She can plan her dream-structured trip next year, and you can live your best spontaneous backpacker life now. Win-win.”

Another user chimped and said, “If she was really involved in the trip, she would have booked flights when you said. She was not really committed but liked the idea to be involved in a European trip.”

“You gave her months!” Another person added. “She had plenty of time. It sounds like she wanted you to plan her trip not your trip together. Enjoy your solo adventure.”

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Another user could, meanwhile, see both sides of the situation, write that the woman was wrong “to not only tell her about your decision, even when you had booked and waited for her to come to you excited to finally book tickets before he broke the news.”

But she made a page with her, “to keep you with the journey you originally planned and opted out of an incompatible travel buddy and the journey they wanted to turn it into.”

“Honestly, you should have done so much in the past, as soon as you two realized that you wanted very different travel styles,” added the comment.