The woman skips friend’s wedding due to cost but plans “mini holiday” with husband

• A woman shared on Reddit that her best friend has a destination wedding but she can’t participate because it’s “too expensive”
• Her bride-to-be friend got angry when she found out that Redditor instead saved some “mini-holiday” with her husband
• The bride to be accused Redditor of not prioritizing her friendship or her wedding

One woman says that her best friend, a bride to be, has accused her of having the wrong priorities because she has declined to participate in her destination wedding due to cost-and instead plan some “mini-holiday” with her husband.

The woman detailed her dilemma in a post on Reddit‘S “Am in A ——” forum, which starts by explaining that traveling to her friend’s wedding would cost almost $ 6,000 for both her and her husband and demand that they arrange childcare for their two children while they are away for a week.

OP (original poster) said that the wedding just isn’t in her budget right now.

“I told (my friend) that I can’t afford it because we just remortgaged and did $ 50,000 repairs in our house and I didn’t expect the trip to be so expensive (my sister’s destination wedding was about $ 1,200 per person),” she wrote.

Then OP’s friend asked her what she was doing for the weekend and was upset when she told her that she is traveling to a comic convention with her husband. The bride-to be continued to send OP a long message and complained that her other friends have all agreed to attend the wedding and claim that she gave OP “plenty of time to save.”

In her post, OP explained that she instead saves for a few small holidays with her husband. She also shared that she knew she could not afford her friend’s wedding and got up and planned the bride’s engagement party to show her support. “I couldn’t afford to go to The Bachelorette Party either because it was $ 1,200 (for) this weekend,” she noted.

Now OP feels “horrible” about the situation and asks colleague Redditors for feedback. “Aita (am I a ——) for not going to my (best friend’s) wedding and for traveling (instead)?” she asked.

Later, in an update of her post, OP added that the bride said that her decision not to participate in the wedding “basically shows my priorities for our relationship.” She also shared that there is now “a tribe” between the couple.

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In the comment section, many readers agreed that OP would not feel bad that she cannot afford to go to the destination wedding, while she noted that her “mini holiday” probably won’t cost even as much as the $ 6,000 she would have to scale out for the wedding.

“You are not obliged to prove your lack of means to motivate your inability to participate, and I strongly doubt to skip your mini holidays would come somewhere close to paying for the event anyway,” wrote a person.

The same commentator also pointed out: “Anyone who chooses an expensive wedding alternative must expect it to be out of reach of some of the people they would like to be there. Unless the couple is prepared to offer financial support, they are obliged to Lovely Accept it when people decrease due to lack of funds. ”

Another reader agreed to write, “Destination wedding places an unnecessary financial burden for the guests while the happy couple gets a significantly subsidized wedding and honeymoon. Your friend should check her privilege. And you should stop feeling bad not to go.”