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A moment of silent tenderness took the center in a room full of pastel decorations and expectant joy at a couple of baby shows.
In the middle of the laughter and the gift opening was transferred a white box from wife to husband. Inside, embedded in soft tissue paper, was one teddy bear made of old clothes.
A wave of emotions crashed over Isaac Adame, it soon to be the father, when he realized that the filled toy was sewn together with his convicted mother’s jeans symbol of love, inheritance and healing.
Lori Sharnick gave birth to Isaac at the age of 17. She was diagnosed with Rabdomyosarcoma, a rare cancer of the muscle tissue, and was told that it was a terminal on her 30th birthday. Lori died on April 28, 2010, long before her son met her bride, Angelica.
“I wanted to surprise my husband with this gift because I knew how much it would mean for him to include his mother in some way,” says Angelica exclusively. “If it was the other way around, I know I would miss my mom at my baby show and feel sad if she couldn’t be a part of it.”
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Angelica did not hesitate to move the limelight from the child to her husband and give him something so personal and unexpected that it moved the whole room to tears. “It felt like the right time to give it to him while the rest of our loved ones were all in the room with us,” she says.
Angelica Adame
The idea behind the teddy bear originated from a hairstyle meeting. One of Angelica’s clients, who is a seamstress, mentioned the concept of memory bears – filled animals sewn from recycled clothes.
“I knew immediately that I wanted to do the same for my husband,” she shares. “I ended up going through a store that I found on Etsy that specialized in making bears of loved ones that have gone. I met my husband’s grandparents to get jeans from them while my husband worked.”
Although Angelica never met Isaac’s mother, she had seen a photograph of Lori standing proudly by her motorcycle in a pair of worn jeans. “When my husband opened the bear, he knew exactly what jeans they were too,” she reminds. “Denim blue color also felt right because we have a boy.”
Angelica Adame
After Isaac read the message written on the teddy bear, he realized that the toy’s sentimental value. “I immediately broke inside,” he admits. “I brought her ash to the baby shower to have her there that way, but to see this bear and know that our child will have something of her to be close to him … It was just overwhelming.”
Isaac admits to having a rocky relationship with her mother before her diagnosis. He was sent off to live with his father during his early years.
“My mom struggled for parenting me … Her life was not easy, and to be completely honest, that she made the decision to make me stay with my dad instead was probably the best for me,” he says.
Isaac learned at the age of 5 that the man who raised him was not his biological father, who triggered a year -long identity crisis. But everything changed when his mother was diagnosed with cancer. With limited time, they both worked to rebuild their relationship.
“She sacrificed her time with me to improve my life,” he admits. “It taught me that for my children I always have to put them first, even if it means putting my own wishes and needs on the back burner.”
Angelica Adame
The expectant danger hopes he never has to make the same difficult choice as his mother made, but always wants to do the best for his son.
“My mother’s passing taught me to take care of life because you never know when or how God will call you home,” admits Isaac. “My mom means everything to me, she affects all parts of my life. I want to live as fully as possible.”
Isaac turns 29 this year – the same age was his mother when she was first diagnosed. “I feel that there is not enough time on this earth with the ones I love, so every day past this is a blessing for me, and my mother taught me it,” he explains.
Angelica Adame
When high school sweethearts prepare to welcome their son, the teddy bear now has a special place in their growing family.
“I’m glad our son will always have something to remember his grandmother Lori,” says Angelica. “It will be sweet to think that she is watching over him while he holds the bear, and I hope it will make him feel that he can talk to her and have a relationship with her even if she is not physically here.”